Midlife Maven

I am rehoming this post from my adoptee site: BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS ARE THE ADOPTEE NORM, RIGHT? Posted on October 10, 2018 I’m going through a divorce.  Married for 3 1/2 years. I’m 53 years old. My 3rd divorce. And I had a long 7-year relationship in there too, that ended in 2011.  So lets call this 4 “real” relationships in my life.  And a few others in there with some deep feelings too.  Yep, like a stream of destruction in my wake… How am I on the road to either Elizabeth Taylor, or the crazy cat lady when that’s so not what I want… or need… or ever my intention?  Did my broken-ness cause this? I read a 2017 post from a fellow adult adoptee and therapist recently. This paragraph really hit me between the eyes: “When rejected, I go weak, lose access to my strengths in a way that can feel dangerous, threatening my life force. All it takes is a conflict with a loved one or the sense I’ve made an unforgivable mistake. I buckle at...

It's been a weird week. A thought provoking week.  I spent this week with husband #2.  We were married for about 2 minutes in the mid - 90's.  Once our relationship went south, I was pretty scared off marriage, and didn't do that again for 18 years!   He'd been to visit in Colorado, and has spent some time with Le Douche.   He has one super-salient point - "well, you know he really was only "Truck, Beer, Hunt"  no other channel. Not a lot of depth, not a lot of substance, but Truck, Beer, Hunt." Yep.  I do have nice garage doors and gates look better... and something to think on .